One of the most counterintuitive truths about therapeutic alliance: the struggle against it often makes it worse. Acceptance — clearly misunderstood — is one of the most powerful tools available.
What Acceptance of Therapeutic Alliance Actually Means
Acceptance does NOT mean:
- Liking or approving of therapeutic alliance
- Giving up on getting better
- Thinking therapeutic alliance is okay
Acceptance DOES mean:
- Acknowledging therapeutic alliance without adding unnecessary struggle against the fact of its existence
- Allowing therapeutic alliance to be present without fighting it into bigger problems
- Making room for therapeutic alliance while still living your values
The ACT Approach to Therapeutic Alliance
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) uses acceptance as a core tool: instead of fighting therapeutic alliance, you learn to make room for it while committing to valued action regardless.
The Paradox of Accepting Therapeutic Alliance
Many people find that when they stop fighting therapeutic alliance and simply allow it, it loses intensity. The suffering of therapeutic alliance is partly the struggle against it.