Radical acceptance — completely accepting reality as it is, without fighting what cannot be changed — is one of the most transformative skills for sexual abuse.
What Radical Acceptance Means for Sexual Abuse
Radical acceptance does not mean:
- Approving of sexual abuse or the situation that caused it
- Giving up on change
- Being passive
It means: stopping the war against reality. The suffering from sexual abuse is partly the fight against the fact of sexual abuse.
How Non-Acceptance Amplifies Sexual Abuse
'I shouldn't feel this way' → additional layer of suffering on top of sexual abuse 'This shouldn't be happening' → added distress that changes nothing but worsens everything
Practicing Radical Acceptance for Sexual Abuse
- Observe that you are fighting reality
- Remind yourself: reality is as it is, even if you don't like it
- Consider the causes that led to sexual abuse
- Practice accepting with your whole body — not just your mind
- Create a coping statement: 'This is what is happening right now. I can accept it.'