Co-regulation — the calming of our nervous system through connection with a regulated other — is one of the most powerful and underappreciated online therapy interventions.
What Co-Regulation Is and Why It Matters for Online Therapy
Humans are social mammals whose nervous systems are literally designed to be regulated through connection. When someone calm and safe is with us, our nervous systems naturally mirror theirs.
This is why online therapy tends to worsen in isolation and improve with genuine connection.
Co-Regulation in Online Therapy Treatment
The therapeutic relationship provides co-regulation — a calm, regulated presence that directly helps the client's nervous system settle during online therapy.
Safe relationships in daily life serve the same function. This is part of why social isolation is so damaging for online therapy.
Building Co-Regulatory Relationships for Online Therapy
- Identify people whose presence tends to calm rather than activate your online therapy
- Intentionally spend time with these people during difficult online therapy periods
- Pets provide co-regulation for many people with online therapy
- Therapeutic relationships (therapist, psychiatrist) provide professional co-regulation