Emotion Regulation and Perfectionism: Breaking the Impossible Standard

How perfectionism drives Emotion Regulation and how to build excellence without self-destruction.

Perfectionism is both a driver and a symptom of emotion regulation. Understanding this relationship is essential for breaking the cycle.

How Perfectionism Feeds Emotion Regulation

  • Perfectionist standards are unachievable, guaranteeing chronic disappointment
  • Harsh self-criticism when falling short of perfect standards directly drives emotion regulation
  • Procrastination (a perfectionism avoidance strategy) creates shame and increases emotion regulation
  • The gap between standards and reality is a constant source of emotion regulation

Types of Perfectionism in Emotion Regulation

Self-oriented perfectionism: Unrealistically high personal standards Other-oriented perfectionism: Unrealistically high standards for others Socially prescribed perfectionism: Belief that others demand perfection from you

The last type has the strongest link to emotion regulation.

Moving from Perfectionism to Excellence

Excellence — doing your best with available resources — is compatible with emotion regulation management. Perfectionism — doing it perfectly or not at all — is not.

CBT and ACT are particularly effective for the perfectionism-emotion regulation cycle.

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