A chronic illness is a condition that endures for at least a year and requires ongoing medical care or consistently limits the scope of a person's daily activities. Major chronic conditions include cancer, heart disease, diabetes, lung disease, asthma, HIV/AIDS, stroke, arthritis, multiple sclerosis, epilepsy, Crohn's disease, chronic fatigue syndrome, fibromyalgia , and kidney disease, among others. Tens of millions of American adults live with a chronic illness, and many of them live with at l
Chronic Illness and Relationships
A diagnosis of chronic illness necessarily changes a relationship, affecting almost every aspect of a couple’s connection, including finances, sex , housekeeping, and parenting . Relationships can be strained as partners and families cope with the pressures of caregiving and the fear of losing a loved one, but the couples that stay together and even thrive are those who recognize that chronic illness is a shared challenge and are open with each other about their fears.
Partners are likely to grieve for the loss of the life they had together , but if they do so openly and allow themselves to be vulnerable with each other, experts suggest, they have a better chance of staying together and continuing to find satisfaction in their relationship. That crucially means acknowledging the significant changes for the partner who is not ill as well as the one who is, maintaining positivity, and remaining ready to adapt to unpredictability.
After a diagnosis of chronic illness, people may feel “broken,” and wonder in particular if they can maintain an active sex life . Clinicians generally agree that, for most patients, the positives of sex outweigh any negatives or limitations, and suggest keeping in mind that all relationships face challenges. In practical terms, shifting a couple's focus from penetrative, or performance-based, sex toward pleasure-based sex that involves a wider range of intimate activities, can often creatively accommodate for limitations and still provide satisfaction and connection for partners.
That they can’t do it all, they can’t do it alone, and they’re at risk. Caregiving researchers consistently find that the caregiving partner’s quality of life is typically worse than that of the patient . They advise that caregivers find someone outside the home to confide in, and not keep the scope of their role a secret; that they eschew guilt, either on the bad days or the days when they enjoy themselves away from their partner; that they be open about their struggles with their partner; and that they resist becoming isolated in their home, even if their partner is primarily housebound.
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