One of the most counterintuitive truths about adoption: the struggle against it often makes it worse. Acceptance — clearly misunderstood — is one of the most powerful tools available.
What Acceptance of Adoption Actually Means
Acceptance does NOT mean:
- Liking or approving of adoption
- Giving up on getting better
- Thinking adoption is okay
Acceptance DOES mean:
- Acknowledging adoption without adding unnecessary struggle against the fact of its existence
- Allowing adoption to be present without fighting it into bigger problems
- Making room for adoption while still living your values
The ACT Approach to Adoption
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) uses acceptance as a core tool: instead of fighting adoption, you learn to make room for it while committing to valued action regardless.
The Paradox of Accepting Adoption
Many people find that when they stop fighting adoption and simply allow it, it loses intensity. The suffering of adoption is partly the struggle against it.