When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Turn on Reality TV
Escapism, empathy, and the unexpected comfort of watching strangers lie.
Posted May 12, 2026 | Reviewed by Ekua Hagan
Over the last six months, I’ve had a tricky time health- wise . As many who live with chronic conditions know too well, the rug can be pulled out from under you at any given moment, and finding a way back to your start line again isn’t easy.
In these moments, there are many science-backed ways to help manage your mindset. Research has shown that sleep, rest, time in nature, and eating regularly all help your body heal and your mind stay centered. But there is also a whole cast of characters with sprinkle cookies and taglines waiting in the wings to help you along your recovery path. As I catch myself deep diving into yet another Bravo-based scandal to distract me from my symptoms, I want to understand if switching on really helps you switch off?
No Murderers in the Building
Whether it’s a "will-they-or-won’t-they romance" or women sitting around luxurious dinner tables, draped in designer clothing, "just trying to move forward," relationships form the core of every reality TV show. But what is being a bystander in these emotionally charged moments doing to our brains?
Clinical psychologist Dr. Trent says that watching people fall in love and enjoy the honeymoon stages of a romance can release our own feel-good hormones and increase our oxytocin levels. She adds that these moments can provide a safe mental loop for venting our own frustrations in complex dynamics. Stress hormones may rise as we watch people argue over seemingly nothing, but when the scene ends and focus changes, we can also let that frustration go, as the people involved are not around our own dinner table.
Trying to solve an unsolved murder whilst you are physically at your lowest might not sound like the most obvious recovery tool. But research has shown that your true crime obsession might have more therapeutic benefits than initially realised.
Whilst real life exists in the grey areas, watching true crime gives us a methodical approach to problem-solving with an ending that often answers the questions that were posed at the start. Rather than enhancing our "dark side," psychologists have shown that it’s often more likely to improve our own sense of vigilance at home, as well as fulfilling our own curiosity.
The bonds that viewers form with the people they watch on their favourite reality shows can go beyond fandom. Research into these parasocial relationships (PSRs) has shown that these connections share characteristics with real-life friendships when it comes to sympathy and intimacy .
Studies suggest PSRs can be more meaningful than acquaintanceships, with "quasi-friend" considered an appropriate term for the relationship between audience members and a parasocial partner. Post-pandemic, we know that the loneliness epidemic has impacted young people in unprecedented numbers. But data has shown that these parasocial relationships can help with loneliness and even with the stigma of mental health conditions.
It’s Not Just Cocktails and Yachts
Strategy-based reality TV takes our brains on a different route while still providing a distraction from our own challenges. Being thrown into a world that requires snap decisions and forging strategic partnerships can provide our own mental workout as we try to both think for the players and imagine ourselves in a similar scenario.
But as we watch from our sofas rather than lurking in a castle graveyard, the stakes for us are low and can bring fun, family debate, and suspense as we wait to see whether the competitors listen to what we are screaming at them or follow their own advice. Furthermore, when we are arguing about why the participants can’t identify the "obvious" traitor, we are not thinking about our own to-do list or worrying about why the doctor hasn’t called us back yet.
Real-Life Lessons From Reality TV
Can we learn about economics by watching game-led reality TV? Some institutions are taking this research seriously. The University of Notre Dame runs a course called "Dynamics of Survivor," which teaches mathematical game theory and social cognitive neuroscience , then asks students to play their own "Survivor" game and apply what they've learned. Psychology researchers use the show's structure because it maps directly onto how the brain handles decision-making .
As one philosophy professor states, "Often for me, watching 'Cops' or 'Love Is Blind' or 'Survivor' with at least just a little bit of a critical lens provides as much insight into the human condition as a thousand academic articles. Anybody can watch 'Survivor,' and anybody can engage in a deep dialogue about what it means."
Out of the classroom, 'The Traitors' has brought its own watercooler phenomenon to the workplace, and enthusiastic fans have brought watered-down versions to their own workplaces. While lying to your colleagues is usually discouraged, done correctly, playing team-based games can improve morale, strategic thinking, and unite remote working employees. My faithful husband came second in his team game and still reminds me most days about his achievement in making it (almost) to the end!
Whilst some think that reality TV's impact on how we think is positive overall , as with most things that bring us both distraction and light relief, balance matters. Cognitive scientist John Francis Leader at University College Dublin says the research is still catching up , but the consensus points toward mindful consumption: "If we are learning about things we're curious about and not just enjoying the misery of others, it can be good for us mentally."
The key to enjoying the benefits of reality TV? Knowing when to change your own channel and switch off.
Share this post Facebook Bluesky Linkedin Email
There was a problem adding your email address. Please try again.
By submitting your information you agree to the Psychology Today Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy
Clara Doran, MBBS, MRCGP, is an experienced family medical health practitioner, TEDx speaker, and author, living with MS.
Get the help you need from a therapist near you–a FREE service from Psychology Today.
This article is part of the Bringwise Psychology Journal — daily insights on human behavior, mental health, and personal growth.