Journal
AddictionAnxietyADHDAsperger'sAutismBipolar Disorder

How to Take Steps Away From OCD

June 6, 20264 min read

Wholehearted exposure and response prevention for OCD.

Posted May 19, 2026 | Reviewed by Gary Drevitch

Obessive Compulsive Disorder can be terrifying and debilitating, but it is treatable. You do not need to continue suffering from it or let it get in the way of the life you want to live. Working with a therapist who offers skilled and precise Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) can help you fully walk away from all compulsions. But to do this, you have to be all in.

Here’s one way I explain ERP to my clients:

The brave but cautious knight came to a fork in the road. One path led her East, the other path West. Facing the knight was a stone with directions engraved on it. “To the East,” the stone said, “is a life filled with adventure, creativity , fun, family, friends, and learning”. The knight read this and nodded with excitement; those were all things she wanted in her life.

But the stone’s inscription continued, “to the West is a life with filled with certainty”. Again, the knight nodded. This was also a life that she craved.

Each day she would spend hours checking that she had got all the details correct, reviewing all she’d done that day to make sure that she hadn’t said or done anything that might cause offence or harm someone. She’d reassure herself that she was doing the right things. She would ask reassurance from her loved ones so she could be more certain that she had not done anything wrong; she would hate to feel like there was a chance that she might be responsible for anything that could even possibly cause hard. She sometimes even retraced her steps to make sure that she had not hit anything along her path.

The problem was that the knight valued being brave and moving towards the life she wanted, but at the same time she also felt a strong need to be completely and utterly certain at all times: 99% certain wasn’t enough because the cost of it not being OK felt like too high a price to pay.

So she pushed herself to take a step East by doing something she cared about. Then she took a step West by checking that she hadn’t hurt anyone while taking her previous step. Then she bullied herself to take another step East by helping a friend. Then another step West by reviewing all she’d done in her mind to make sure it was all OK. Then reluctantly she took another step East by doing something fun. Then another step West by giving herself reassurance that what she had done was safe. Then another step East… Then another step West…

At the end of the day, she was exhausted but still in the same spot. Still trying to move East and West at the same time.

As a clinical psychologist who works with OCD , I frequently meet people who find themselves in a similar situation to this brave but cautious knight. They know that the treatment plan involves Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) so they tentatively push themselves to take a step in that direction, whilst still trying to also move in the opposite direction by engaging in compulsions no one else can observe, such as self-reassurance, history checking, bargaining with their OCD (e.g I’ll do this now and then later I can do some more checking) and more. At the end of this ERP, they are exhausted because they have pushed themselves really hard, but still feel no closer to beating their OCD.

That’s why it is important to do ERP with curiosity and precision. Notice that you’re having thoughts and worries; notice where you are right now and that you’re more than your OCD. Then choose to be all in with your ERP, dropping all avoidance as well as all observable and non-observable compulsions and instead moving towards the life that really matters to you. It's a scary ride, but future you is so pleased that you're choosing to take these wholehearted steps now.

To find a therapist, visit the Psychology Today Therapy Directory .

Share this post Facebook Bluesky Linkedin Email

There was a problem adding your email address. Please try again.

By submitting your information you agree to the Psychology Today Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Ben Sedley is a writer and a clinical psychologist. His latest book is Holding the Heavy Stuff: Making Space for Critical Thoughts and Painful Emotions .

Get the help you need from a therapist near you–a FREE service from Psychology Today.


This article is part of the Bringwise Psychology Journal — daily insights on human behavior, mental health, and personal growth.

Go deeper with Bringwise

Psychology book summaries. 10 minutes each. Human-written.

Start Free Today