How to Stop Obsessing Over the Bad Stuff
The mind can set itself on a brooding track and remain there.
Posted January 30, 2026 | Reviewed by Tyler Woods
We focus on how things will eventually pan out one day somewhere in the distant future. We fantasize and dream of what tomorrow will bring. I used to do that myself in my youth. I dreamed of a flawless home, an exciting career , an adoring husband, and a flock of superb children. Many of these things did pan out. I do have superb children, of course, with all the lumps and bumps they are supposed to have. I do have an adoring husband, as well as an excellent ex-husband. I do have meaningful work, though I am not the exciting superagent spy I thought I might have been.
The mind wanders to the past and future all the time. Everyone does this, but some of us do it more than others. Mostly it’s about things that happened or might happen, and things that didn’t or won’t sit well with us. The mind is then set on a brooding track and remains there.
In a classic study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology , subjects were shown a variety of photographs—positive images like people riding a rollercoaster, neutral images like a hairdryer, and negative images like a gun pointed at the camera. The researchers found that the brain lights up more when viewing the image of the gun.
The brain is prejudiced toward bad stuff , according to psychologists Paul Rozin and Edward Royzman and other researchers. Adverse interactions with other people and general malaise stick in our heads. Why do media outlets splash negative headlines? We are more attentive and drawn to bad news—this means their ratings go up and they generate more advertising revenue. The media know we need to pay attention to survive; it gives the brain what it wants.
The tendency toward a dim view can also harm our relationships. At first impression , for example, we may focus on the minor flaws of a new person we meet, which may be a form of stranger danger. And we may even focus on the negative in long-term relationships by immediately feeling defensive when we hear an inkling of criticism.
This mental prejudice can be described in a few ways.
We recall the bad the most. Why did my friend make that hurtful comment? Our dread increases over time. We may start here: My medical procedure will be hard. And we may end here : My medical procedure will be a disaster. We remember our mistakes the most. I am thinking of that faux pas I made last week. We think repeatedly about negative events. I keep thinking and thinking of that faux pas.
When we are aware of these mental habits, we can call out the brain.
Negativity is more complex than positivity. We have to work to wrap our minds around it. Essentially, we are wired to obsess on gloominess and threats so that we can thwart those threats and remain safe.
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Adapted from How to Be Less Miserable . Blackstone Publishing, 2025.
Negative information weighs more heavily on the brain : The negativity bias in evaluative categorizations. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. T. A. Ito et al.
Negativity Bias, Negativity Dominance, and Contagion . Personality and Social Psychology Review. 2001. P. Rozin, E. Royzman
Tierney, J., & Baumeister, R.F. (2019). The Power of Bad : How the negativity effect rules us — and how we can rule it . New York: Penguin.
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Lybi Ma is the executive editor of Psychology Today and author of How to Be Less Miserable.
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This article is part of the Bringwise Psychology Journal — daily insights on human behavior, mental health, and personal growth.