Empathy Is Important, But This Is Even Moreso
Personal Perspective: Unlock the power of compassion for advocacy and support.
Posted October 31, 2025 | Reviewed by Tyler Woods
Autism is a condition that impacts many people and is rarely understood by those who don’t take the time to understand it or who have the privilege that means it doesn’t impact them. I work as a therapist and consultant and am often advocating for myself and others to make accommodations and adjustments to improve the quality of life for those living with neurological conditions (mainly ASD and ADHD ).
Autism is an alienating condition, as it impacts the way we communicate, socially interact, and our social imagination . Many of the people I work with, myself included, are often expected to navigate and engage in systems and services that feel confusing, distressing, and scary to us. Schools can be hugely problematic and feel very unsafe to many children on the spectrum, as well as the legal system for many adults. I have personal and professional experiences of working with and engaging with both of these systems.
When working within these systems and navigating the processes associated, I have come to learn that there are many neurodivergent allies in these spaces. Allies are the people who make things easier and try their best to meet our needs and respect our differences. Many people hold empathy as a valuable and significant quality. Whilst I believe empathy is important, I also believe it can be overstated and overemphasized. I believe compassion is much more important.
Empathy is the ability to put yourself in another person’s shoes and attempt to understand and experience their world as much as possible. When I was assessed for ASD, it was noted that I was hyper- empathic . This was something I had known for a long time and was one of the reasons it took me so long to identify as being on the spectrum. I was influenced by the outdated and untrue narratives about how many people on the spectrum (mainly men) lacked empathy. I now know that empathy is not fixed and that there are many types of empathy. I also believe people can weaponize and use their ability to empathise to manipulate and cause harm. Empathy and the ability to empathise are not a reflection of morality , integrity, or kindness.
Empathy comes in many forms—there is somatic, emotional, spiritual , and cognitive empathy. I have deep empathy for those experiencing emotional and spiritual pain, and I often can feel it in my body when around them. I do not have the same skill or ability when it comes to cognitive processes. I can only empathise cognitively when I hear the person sharing their thoughts, and if they explain their thinking processes. That is often when I am most aware of the difference in the way my brain works and how it diverges from others.
Recently, I was involved in court processes that were painful and confusing, and I found there was empathy; most people were able to understand and empathise with my position, but that didn’t mean they were kind or compassionate. However, there were also those who were compassionate, and they were the people who supported me and helped me through. I neither wanted to go to court nor had any control over going through the divorce process, and anybody who works with people on the spectrum understands how important consent and consideration are for us. It is important so that we can regulate our nervous systems and stay well. If we can't regulate our nervous system , we cannot communicate or engage in a healthy way.
Since I became a therapist and have worked with many people, I understand that empathy is powerful, but I strongly believe compassion always wins. I genuinely think it is the most important quality a person can have. In the court processes, I saw compassion in the security team, in the administrative team, and in the judge’s final decision. It shone out of them and made things easier, brought some relief, and peace in painful times. These people can often be found in all systems and services, and they are who I seek out when advocating for myself and others. Decent people being kind in hard times. In the court processes, the compassion I received meant that I was able to win the case and get what I needed against the odds. And that is why I firmly believe that compassion always wins.
The root of compassion is to see another person’s pain and try to bring them peace and calm in the middle of chaos. I believe this is what we all should be doing for each other. And especially for people who are vulnerable and living with disabilities. If you can empathise with someone but make things harder for them, that is cruel. But if you can empathise and alleviate their pain in some small way, that is powerful. That is what we all need more of in this world. Being neurodivergent is not a weakness; it is a difference. Compassion is how we can all connect, relate to, and support each other in difficult times.
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Louise Taylor, Ph.D., is a therapist and coach who specializes in working with neurodivergent clients and identifies as neurodivergent herself.
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This article is part of the Bringwise Psychology Journal — daily insights on human behavior, mental health, and personal growth.