Do You Still Feel That You’re Not Good Enough?

How to recognize that you are enough.

Posted December 8, 2025 | Reviewed by Monica Vilhauer Ph.D.

If you feel that you’re not good enough, you’re not alone. Research has shown how many successful people suffer from imposter syndrome , believing that they’re not good enough (Bravata et al., 2020). A recent international review revealed the prevalence of inferiority feelings in people around the world (Amani & Taqiyah, 2024).

I’ve been there too. I was a shy child who loved books, while my brother was a charming extrovert and my mother’s favorite. “Your brother has a very high I.Q.,” my mother would say. “He’s going to be president one day.” I was dismissed as a shy, skinny kid who never seemed to get her approval.

But school was a different story. I loved learning, got good grades, and my teachers recognized and acknowledged me. When my mother told me that they couldn’t afford to send me to college, I got a job at the local newspaper and worked my way through college. I received a graduate fellowship, went on to get a PhD, and began teaching college students. As a college professor, I wanted to empower my students, to help them discover their strengths and realize that they had something valuable to offer.

From my experience, I’ve discovered that what matters most is not what is done to us, but how we respond. For example:

What about you? When you were a child, did someone tell you that you were not “good enough”? Perhaps it was a parent, a teacher, or someone else who couldn’t see you and couldn’t appreciate who you were?

If so, you might benefit from psychologist Kristin Neff’s practice of self-compassion:

Mindfulness . Instead of attacking or shaming yourself if you’ve made a mistake or feel inferior, tune in to how you feel. Then name your feelings for yourself. “I feel” [name your feelings] “sad”. . . “nervous”. . . “guilty” . . . “worried” . . .“scared”. . .” anxious ” . . . “ashamed”. . . “hurt”. . . “angry” or something else.
Common humanity. Remind yourself that it’s only human to feel this way. You can tell yourself, “It’s OK. No one’s perfect.”
Kindness to yourself. Then comfort yourself with kind words. You can reassure yourself by saying something like, “I know this is hard and you’re really hurting right now. I’m here for you” (Neff, 2011).

If you’re still struggling with deep feelings of shame and unworthiness and you find you need additional assistance, you might reach out to a supportive counselor or therapist.

Remember that we are all human. No one’s perfect. And you are enough. You are a unique, valuable human being.

This post is for informational purposes and should not substitute for psychotherapy with a qualified professional.

Amani, D. Z., & Taqiyah, I. (2024). Factors Influencing Inferiority Feelings: A Systematic Review. Journal of Scientific Research, Education, and Technology (JSRET) , 3 (4), 1756-1766.

Bravata, D. M., Watts, S. A., Keefer, A. L., Madhusudhan, D. K., Taylor, K. T., Clark, D. M., Nelson, R.S., Cokley, K. O., & Hagg, H. K. (2020). Prevalence, predictors, and treatment of impostor syndrome: a systematic review. Journal of General Internal Medicine , 35 (4), 1252-1275.

Neff, K. (2011). Self-compassion: Stop beating yourself up and leave insecurity behind. New York, NY: William Morrow. For more information about self-compassion, see http://www.self-compassion.org/

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Diane Dreher, Ph.D. , is an author, researcher, and positive psychology coach.

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This article is part of the Bringwise Psychology Journal — daily insights on human behavior, mental health, and personal growth.